The Romance of Self-Discovery
There is a Hole in My Sidewalk
I walk down the street. There is a hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost…I am helpless. It isn’t my fault. It takes forever to find a way out.
I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t believe I am in the same place. But, it isn’t my fault. It still takes me a long time to get out.
I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it there. I still fall in. It’s a habit. My eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately.
I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it.
I walk down another street.
This is a beautiful poem that can be used to describe denial. Denial is a defense mechanism that inhibits someone from accepting reality or admitting the truth. This defense mechanism functions in order to protect the ego against anxiety, pain, sadness, etc. We all tend to get stuck in a pattern (i.e. habit) and not know how to get out – it really does feel like it is not our fault because we all do try to change it. The goal is to be able to stand back and see how you have participated in the cycle and understand why you keep getting pulled back in. In order to do this you will need to start peeling back the layers within yourself = self discovery. Once you accept the situation for what it is, it will be easier for you to walk away and say goodbye, and start down another path. Self-awareness is the key to freedom.